Iraqi Doctors Hail Eradication of Obesity

SATIRE

"Doctors at Iraq's Health Ministry have announced that obesity, which had reached epidemic proportions in Iraq in the late 1980's, has now declined to negligible rates. The WTO has added Iraq to the growing list of countries who have eradicated the chronic condition which once constituted the greatest risk to the health of Iraqi children.

"Iraq's child obesity rate now roughly equals that of Burundi, a central African nation torn by more than a decade of war. It is far lower than rates in Uganda and Haiti.

"Some doctors disputed that lower fat diets and increased exercise alone had brought an end to the epidemic. They believe that dysentery owing to contaminated water supplies plays a key role. But all were unanimous in thanking America's long term commitment to the future of Iraq for what is hopefully its final eradication."